cliff jump

A blonde and a man both jumped off a cliff at the same time. Which made it to the ground first?The man because the blonde had to stop and ask for directions.

Blonde paint job

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do."Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money."You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."

i live here

just kiding

the one thing i won't eat

The One Thing I Won't Eat I don't care how nice you ask me
there is one thing I won't eat.
I don't care how much you add to it
to try to make it sweet.
Not a giant pot of honey.
Not a dozen jars of jelly.
Not a sixteen-pack of soda pop
will get one in my belly.
Use a tank of maple syrup
or a truckload full of fudge.
Bring a hundred cans of frosting
but you will not make me budge.
Try a thousand pounds of chocolate
or a million tons of sugar.
I don't care how much you sweeten it,
I will not eat a booger.

i only want the ketchup

I Only Want Ketchup I only want ketchup.

It's all that I like.
I don't need a burger.
I don't need a bike.
I don't want a tuba,
a truck or a train,
bananas, bandanas,
pianos or rain.
I'll pass on canasta,
gymnastics and chess.
I don't need a diamond
a dog or a dress.
I'm fine without fairies,
canaries or figs,
tomatoes, tornadoes,
tortillas and twigs.
I'd give up guitars
and carnations and cheese,
The sparkling stars
and the wind in the trees,
I don't need a hug
or an afternoon hike.
Juss pass me the ketchup.
It's all that I like.

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about jojo

G'day mates I'm Jojo and I'm 11 years old. My favourite sport is footy. My favourite animals are monkeys. My favourite food is nachos and chocolate and i like every colour. My favourite thing to do is ride my bike and go on the net. i hate homework and wish there was none. i like going to the beach and going camping. i like mad magazines and read them a lot.
well that all fokes!

soccer